{\rtf1\fbidis\ansi\ansicpg1256\deff0\deflang1033{\fonttbl{\f0\fswiss\fprq2\fcharset0 Arial;}{\f1\fswiss\fprq2\fcharset178 Arial;}} {\colortbl ;\red0\green0\blue0;} \viewkind4\uc1\pard\ltrpar\qc\cf1\b\f0\fs44 GRIEVING SKILLS\b0\f1\rtlch\fs28\par \pard\ltrpar\par \f0\ltrch\tab Elizabeth Kubler-Ross discovered what's often called the grief cycle. A more general name might be the assimilation cycle, since even good changes are a stress, and are metabolized with a series of feelings, though not necessarily in the following order or one at a time. \f1\rtlch\fs32\par \par \f0\ltrch\tab These feelings are \b shock\b0 and disbelief and numbness at first, usually. \par \tab Later they're likely to include \b anger\b0 and protesting at one's situation, anger at oneself, \b bargaining\b0 , \b sadness\b0 , \b fear\b0 , and \b yearning\b0 . One is likely to go through these feelings more than once.\f1\rtlch\par \par \f0\ltrch\tab One skill lies in learning to go through these feelings willingly and with self control. It can be a roller coaster ride. There's great power in \b accepting your own feelings\b0 and feeling them.\par \tab Another lies in \b learning the lessons\b0 the emotions bring up, facing the fears that need faced, assimilating the new attitudes that are approriate for a person who's gone through pain.\f1\rtlch\par \f0\ltrch\tab Grieving skills include not taking it out on the people around you, reaching out for \b support\b0 , getting enough \b solitude\b0 , \b breathing\b0 , and letting \b time\b0 go by.\f1\rtlch\par \par \f0\ltrch\tab In the end, by processing one's way through feelings and realizations, one reaches resignation and acknowledgement of the way things are, and (finally, as the culmination of the process) \b acceptance\b0 and a return to your natural level of happiness. \cf0\par }